Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Corrupting the Youth, One Sparkly Vamp at a Time

PhotobucketHave ya'll seen that the Twilight series is one of the most frequently asked books to be banned for 2009? WTF? While I agree that Breaking Fail should be banned just because it is an EPIC FAIL... Seriously? They say it is sexually explicit...where? WHERE DID I MISS THE SEX??

Dude, sex? Really? Yeah, I hate it when a book series marketed to teens alludes to sex within the institution of marriage. Like, twice. Before she becomes pregnant with a demon child. Yeah, that's a HORRID message and should be banned.

Okay, but these complaints are from the same people who thought that reading Harry Potter would eventually lead to ritualistic demon worship, no? So, I'm thinking that they might be a little...*tries to think of a nice way to say this* ... off in the head?

I actually love reading the Challenged Books list so I know what to add to my own TBR list. Somehow, these books are always my favorites.

PhotobucketWinnie the Pooh is on the banned books list.

Well, you know - his relationship with Piglet does raise concerns. *rolls eyes*

PhotobucketThat Winnie the Pooh will lead kids to drug, sex, pyromania and sacrificing goats on a Satanic altar.

*looks at goat-blood-covered-altar in the bathroom* So THAT explains it!

*snort* Okay, but just so we're clear, Twilight only just made it on the list for 2009. Here is the complete list from the ALA:

1. ttyl, ttfn, l8r, g8r (series), by Lauren Myracle
Reasons: Nudity, Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group, Drugs

2. “And Tango Makes Three” by Peter Parnell and Justin Richardson
Reasons: Homosexuality

3. “The Perks of Being A Wallflower,” by Stephen Chbosky
Reasons: Homosexuality, Sexually Explicit, Anti-Family, Offensive Language, Religious Viewpoint, Unsuited to Age Group, Drugs, Suicide

4. “To Kill A Mockingbird,” by Harper Lee
Reasons: Racism, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group

5. Twilight (series) by Stephenie Meyer
Reasons: Sexually Explicit, Religious Viewpoint, Unsuited to Age Group

6. “Catcher in the Rye,” by J.D. Salinger
Reasons: Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group

7. “My Sister’s Keeper,” by Jodi Picoult
Reasons: Sexism, Homosexuality, Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Religious Viewpoint, Unsuited to Age Group, Drugs, Suicide, Violence

8. “The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big, Round Things,” by Carolyn Mackler
Reasons: Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group

9. “The Color Purple,” Alice Walker
Reasons: Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group

10. “The Chocolate War,” by Robert Cormier
Reasons: Nudity, Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group
Sidebra with flames from book burnings: This list isn't brought about by the ALA, but compiled from parent complaints to educators and librarians.

What exactly is "Religious Viewpoint?" I don't remember any religion in Twilight. Except if you take into account the author's religious beliefs? Which include no sex before marriage, which completely negates the whole "Sexually Explicit" thing, right? Right? What am I missing?

Personally, if I wrote a book, I would aspire to be on this list. It would be my greatest accomplishment. And I'm not kidding. If you can get some crazy parents riled up about a book, you know you've written something grand.

PhotobucketAnd if you are getting offended by reading a damn book, perhaps you need to get out more often. Because there is a hell lot more in the REAL world to get offended about than bitch about some damn books damaging your special snowflakes fragile little minds or turning them into atheist socialist commies.

To Kill a Mockingbird?? Are you f*cking serious?? Insanity. Yeah, that Atticus Finch is one debauched asshole. And Scout and Jem will only encourage kids to ask questions, to learn what is right and wrong and PLAY OUTSIDE. OMG. The horror.

Somehow, I don't think the religious viewpoint they are talking about in the Twilight Saga is about the Church of Cullen. And that makes me very suspect of these people. Clearly, they have not been dazzled by the Virgin Edward.

For the record Dusty, you are now my hero. I'm going to print up shirts that say: "Books are damaging your special snowflakes fragile little minds and turning them into atheist socialist commies." We can put our logo on the back. "Come to Whimsical Fic-ery and let us show you how!" Something tells me I'm never going to be on the PTA at my daughter's Catholic school. *smirk*

Sidebra with screenprinting: You didn't think I'd do it, did you? Well, I did. I present to you the Whimsical Fic-ery Spreadshirt Shop.


ANYWAY, I think that Stephenie Meyer should feel honored. This is probably the ONLY way that any of her books would make it onto a list with the likes of The Color Purple and Catcher in the Rye. (No offense Steph, just sayin'. Sparkly vamps aren't exactly ringing the bells of social injustice.)

So, what do you y'all think? Should Steph be flattered? Would you ever read an entire book written in text speak? Let us know!



  1. Love the shirt--That is fantastic!

    Racism in To Kill a Mockingbird?! No Sh*t Sherlocks! That's one of the major themes! These lists always make me crazy.

    I truly do not understand why Twilight's on the list. There is NOTHING sexually explicit (dangit!) And the only semi-religious viewpoint that's ever mentioned that I can think of is the whole soul discussion-and that's barely a religiously based. And "Unsuited to Age" doesn't make sense to me either. I think she should be VERY flattered to be on a list with these books.

  2. I totally want to participate in this year's Banned Book Week. Last year, I took the kids to the library and we touched and flip through their Banned Book Display. So ridiculous. Seriously, it's maddening.

    This year, I want to sport one of these:,266887743


Tell us what you think!