Friday, April 2, 2010

Twidays: Give Us a Bree-eak!

Apparently it's Guest Host week at Whimsical Fic-ery because we have another special guest today! Dusty Moats is joining us today to discuss an important development in the Twi-world!

Things you should know about Dusty: She is staunchly Team Trilogy, so when she says Breaking Fail, that is her way of referring to Breaking Dawn. She doesn't go easy on anyone (including Stephenie Meyer) so if you take your Twilight too seriously, be prepared. And lastly, don't let her fool you: she is a huge fan of all things Twilight. Well, except Breaking Dawn.

Moving on... I'm sure you've all heard the big news in the Twi-world this week, right? That Stephenie Meyer is not releasing Midnight Sun this summer? Instead we get this...

Book Cover found at

Y'all can have meaningful conversation about this, but I just plan to offer alternate book options for her to write INSTEAD OF FREAKIN' WRITING MIDNIGHT SUN.

"Oh Snap! The Life of A Snapple Bottle Cap" - The intriguing history of the bottle cap Edward clung to after eating lunch with Bella. Follow this tiny piece of metal from it's humble beginnings as recycled aluminum cans until the fateful day, in 3055, when the sun goes supernova and melts the earth.

Photobucket See. I would rather read about Edward's bottle cap (only if it fully describes in detail how Bella dies/melts along with the earth). Or, I would rather read Midnight Sun. Or, I dunno, how about Jasper and the Vampire Wars? Even Maria's story. How about Carlisle's back-story. IN FULL. Or Alice. Sweet, sweet Alice's back-story.

But you know what? We all KNEW the Bree book was coming. Smeyer even told us about this f*ckery way back when. Yep. She surely did. We just didn't want to acknowledge the possibility of this Bree f*ckery coming to fruition. SMeyer wouldn't do this to us, would she? But yes, she did. Every time. Every time we have high hopes from SMeyer, she pees on us. Pees. On. Our. Faces.

Look at Breaking Fail as a reference for the whole peeing thing.

But, tell us how you really feel Dusty. *grins*

Okay, okay, so she's not publishing Midnight Sun. But, this does reinforce Stephenie's whole, "I only write when I think it's not for publishing" stance. (sidebra: stance? Is that a stance?) If she thought we actually didn't cry ourselves to sleep over the loss of want to read Midnight Sun, then maybe she would write it. You see where I'm going here? REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY. Let's try it:

Midnight Sun? Pfffft. I would way rather read Buttcrack Santa's backstory than anything else about Edward. I mean, really.

What? It's worth a try.

*rolling my eyes* That is such a bull-crap excuse, though. "Oh no! People want to read what I write! I'll stop writing entirely and wait for them to forget me!"

Now, back to Bree, am I going to read her story? Of course. Am I going to BUY it? Of course not. For all of my bitching, I like SMeyer. I like her books and her writing. I've decided to look at this as her exploring her ability to write something darker than Twilight. I'm assuming there will be lots of dark, bad vampire psyche to delve into. And since she completely copped out and made VampBella PERFECT IN EVERY WAY, we'll actually get to see what a newborn vampire's bloodlust is like.

Of course, if she writes a book about Riley next instead of Midnight Sun I'm completely flouncing her and going back to rereading True Blood. *glares in SMeyer's direction*

Oh, I'll definitely be buying it. I do think it's very cool that she is offering it up for free, but you all know I like the feel of a book in my hands. And, honestly, I'm intrigued by Bree's story and am actually looking forward to reading it.

*ahem* Rain, you're doing that overly optimistic cheerleader thing again. Cut it out.


Photobucket*gags on Bella's Vampire perfection and any reasonable sacrifices she should have had in the cop out known as Breaking Fail*

You know who I want a back-story on? The two Romanian vamps. Those guys were a hoot.

I'm going to read to Bree's story too. Maybe, like Meadow said, SMeyer will give us a glimpse (a PG-13 rated glimpse but beggars can't be picky) into the life of a REAL newborn vamp. Maybe this is her attempt to make up for that missing part in Breaking Fail? Maybe? One can have hope right? I mean, I was really wanting Bella to eat Jessica or Mike Newton or something. I was rooting for Bella to just NOM NOM NOM away on Jessica.

*laughing hysterically at the idea of Bella attacking Jessica* Oh, that's a good idea! I'd love to hear about the Romanians. They seem like REAL Vampires. Or Jane. I freakin' LOVE Jane.

Honestly, there are fanfics that I want to update more than I want to read this story. But I've decided to view it as a step in the right direction. *deep cleansing breath* Remember, SMeyer is still growing as an author. As long as no one tells her they WANT her to write. *snicker*

Right. Like Midnight Sun. We definitely do not want to read that. *whispers* Seriously, this is going to work.

*snort* Okay. Sure. So, Steph, how about writing me one of these?
"The Short and Fractured Life of the Television that Edward Destroyed During 'The Vote'"
"The Short and Ripped Life of Jacob's 25th Pair of Shorts"
"The Short and Smelly Life of the Popcorn Tub that Mike Newton Puked into"

'Cause, you know, that would be better than Midnight Sun.

Okay, what about you all? Are you excited to read Bree's story? Are you feeling let down or just happy to get anything from Stephenie Meyer?


  1. I like Dusty..."Breaking Fail" and "SMeyer, she pees on us. Pees. On. Our. Faces." Love it!

    ::in character of this post:: I don't need to read Midnight Sun. I already read it. It's called Abbracciare il Cantante by Bratty Vamp and that think rocked so much who cares what Smeyer has to say!

    Was I believable? Hope so (although, that fanfic does rock my face off w/ its awesomeness).

    I WILL read it and I WILL buy it because I LOVE giving Smeyer more of my money and I like to collect like things. Call me a wannabe hoarder...see me on the show in 2015 w/ my room full of Twicrap floor to ceiling. ;)

  2. Honestly, I didn't dream about Midnight Sun coming out soon. I have the damn feeling it will take even longer. maybe after Breaking Dawn filming is over to - not earlier. Just a guess though...

    But yes I'll read it and since I need and I'm also going to buy it. If it will be good? dunno. Am I excited? Well, not so much ...

    I mean she could also give us a story about the life after BD. I mean common soooo many open ends. but I fear this will not happen since... that is what we all want, so not going to happen.

    But ladies, awesome post. :))

  3. Oh I forgot to mention:

    "Oh Snap! The Life of A Snapple Bottle Cap"

    I am drinking a Snapple right now so can I be a part of that story? =)

  4. I'll read it-I'll probably even buy it---I like having books in my hands too (it can be pre-ordered for $9 on B& I am looking forward to something a little darker and getting more information about the vampires (which, is part of the reason I liked Breaking Dawn-sorry - aside from perfect Bella - we did get to see vampires in their element-which I liked. And the old crotchety vampires rocked!)

    Now, I'm going to have to duck now, but truly, I could care less about Midnight Sun. I don't want to read the same story from another perspective (again, very sorry) - pick a narrator and stick to it--let me, as the reader, determine the other stories(ie death of the author from Literary Theory--once it's in the world, it's up to me, not the author, to come back and fill in the blanks, etc). WHICH, I know the Bree story is the same thing-but I'm hoping we get less of the repeated stuff-but more of what happens before they ever show up for the battle royale.

    Perhaps my stance will help get it written, though :) And, if it does, I probably will read it. Just saying.

  5. The Bree book is NINE DOLLARS????????? Nine. Dollars. Are you kidding me? Oh, SMeyer. You slay me. I didn't pay that much for any of the REAL Twilight books (except for Breaking Fail damn it Paid full price for it. Even I can see the sick irony in that. I paid to read that crap). But SRSLY?

  6. I never heard the rumours of MS being the mystery book so I was just happy to get anything to feed my addiction :) I'm buying it for sure, I agree with Rain, I love the feel of a real book in my hands!

  7. I love Dusty Moats not only b/c she refers to BD as Breaking Fail but b/c she said that SMeyer "pees on our faces" <-- FTW! Love that.

    As for Bree's story? Can I get some whine with that cheese b/c I am REALLY pissed that SMeyer is doing this instead of MS or *cough* JASPER'S FREAKING STORY!

    The. End.


Tell us what you think!